Bloody Birthday


I love a seasonal horror: Valentine’s Day, April Fool’s Day, Christmas, New Year’s.  I’m not fussy.  So seeing as it’s my birthday, I thought it was a great time to finally check out Bloody Birthday.  And the cherry on the cake is that it was made in the 1980s.  Just like me!

This is me in icing form atop my best ever birthday cake

This is me in icing form atop my best ever birthday cake

The premise is very simple: three 10 year olds born during a solar eclipse, are evil for some reason, and go on a killing spree.  It’s 80s, it’s hokey, there are killer children.  What’s not to like?

Little shits

Little shits

Here are 7 things I learned from Bloody Birthday:

  1. Never give birth during a solar eclipse.
  2. Don’t piss off evil children who were born during a solar eclipse – they’ll kill the shit out of you.
  3. Never have sex in a graveyard, at night, in an open grave.  That’s just asking for trouble.
  4. Junk yards aren’t a good place to play.
  5. Evil children don’t have a clear modus operandi. Those little buggers will make you dead via any means at their disposal.
  6. It’s probably best not to leave your teenage daughter to look after her younger brother for prolonged periods while you piss off on holiday.  That’s just general life advice.
  7. Parents who own guns (and I just need to point out how weird that concept is to me), really should make sure their evil offspring can’t get hold of them.

In short, Bloody Birthday is kind of shit, but I kind of liked it.

Score: 6/10

21 responses to “Bloody Birthday

  1. Bloody Birthday looks soooooo hilariously terrible!! “There’s no escape”. LOL.

  2. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I hope you have a GREAT day!!!!!

    This movie is so shit but kind of awesome!!! GREAT stuff!!



    • Eric! Thanks very much! Had a lovely lunch and now taking a food break before going back out for dinner later. Isn’t food the best?

      • fn!!!!!!!!!!!!

        Food is just great!! I really enjoy it!! I went out last night with an old friend and had a steak and Scotch! For you!! Enjoy your food!!



    • Thanks, Mutant! I had a lovely day, nkt least because I wasn’t at work.

      This one is pretty bad but in a good way!

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