Jurassic World

I loved Jurassic Park when it happened back in 1993.  I watched it again a few weeks ago, and can confirm I still love it now.  It’s a great action film.  I like to pretend 2 and 3 were just a horrible dream, Dallas-style.  The latest one has done phenomenally well at the box office, so far raking in upwards of a bajillion dollars.  So what did I think?  Hmm, yeah it’s not bad.

There’s a bit near the beginning where the park boss, Claire, gives a speech about people being used to dinosaurs.  She tells us they’ve seen it all before.  Dinosaurs alone aren’t exciting enough any more.  People want something bigger and better.  This is funny because this is exactly what’s happened with the films.  This is exactly why this latest edition in the Jurassic Park Canon even exists.  And in a way, this is why Jurassic World was never going to live up to expectations – we’ve seen it all before.

The painfully predictable plot didn’t really bother me.  Those crazy scientists have continued to beaver away in their labs creating dino babies, all the while thinking they’re in charge.  By now, the park is a successful attraction.  But the folks pulling the strings aren’t as clever as they think nor are they as clever as a genetically engineered t-rex hybrid.  Obviously it all goes totally tits up.  It was ever thus with the Jurassic Park franchise.

What’s to like?

Chris Pratt, duh!  I’ve had a lot of love for this guy since he played the slightly useless and chubby Andy in Parks and Rec.  He’s got great comic timing, and charisma by the boat-load.  I started to see him in a slightly different light after Guardian of the Galaxy, and with this later role, he’s made it abundantly clear that he can do Action and Romantic Lead.  I can’t wait to see what he does next.

Also, his character – Owen somethingorother.  He’s a cool bastard.

As with the original the park looks visually brilliant, but this time it’s bigger and better.  Well, more commercial, anyway.  There are some nice touches too, like a pterodactyl aviary and a gallimimus safari which is a nice nod to a scene in the original.

Claire’ shoes.  Claire (Ron Howard’s daughter) runs the park.  And she does it running around gracefully at high speed – in high heels.  She doesn’t trip or stumble.  She can cope with rough terrain.  Her heels don’t get stuck in the mud.  They don’t fall off.  I’m not convinced they didn’t CGI her legs.  Either that or this woman is clearly magic.

 

What’s not to like?

Claire’s shoes.  This is SO RIDICULOUS!  It was kind of distracting.  Has she ever heard of ballet pumps?  Does she have no other shoes?  I counted today and I have four pairs of shoes under my desk at work.  Four.  That’s excluding the pair of TRAINERS I wear on my way to and from work.  What’s she doing?

Also, Claire.  She runs the whole park, sorry, world, and yet she also seems kind of inept.  I mean, she’s not totally useless, but still…  There’s a lot at stake on an island full of dinosaurs… public safety… the business itself… dino research and development worth mulit-millions of pounds… and the woman running it doesn’t seem to know what she’s doing.  That’s reassuring.  It’s great there’s a woman in charge, but why isn’t she knowledgeable, empathetic and self-assured?

Kicking arse and taking names, Ellen Ripley was in charge and knew what she was doing.

Also, I know stupid people making stupid decisions is par for the course, and a necessary evil for films like this, but COME.  ON!  After the events Jurassic Park (I can’t really reference 2 and 3 here, since they didn’t really happen), you really would want them to have learnt SOMETHING.  ANYTHING!  I won’t spoil it, you can point out all the flaws for yourself.

Lazy rehashing of plot points and the recycling of characters from the original was a little irritating – I wanted a new take on the wonderful Jurassic Park formula, not a paint-by-numbers copy.  Oh well, the new Terminator film is out in a couple of weeks…

Score: 6/10

If you’ve stuck with me through this, here’s a bonus image.  Enjoy!

I know this is from Guardians of the Galaxy. It’s research, people.